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Other Voices: 'Spooky' quiet on the Iraqi front

Jun-10-2005 » Filed Under: Iraq News

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By CHRIS ALPINE, THE POST-INTELLIGENCER

As I help buckle a couple of young soldiers into their seats on the C-130 taking us into Iraq, it hits me -- I've become a grizzled veteran and I'm not even in the service. Me knowing more than our troops should scare the hell out of me, but I'm not even apprehensive. Maybe the college girl on the plane over wasn't far off when she asked if I was going to Iraq "on vacation."

We land in Mosul and the first thing that strikes me is how quiet it is. No gunfire, bombs or even hip-hop music blaring at full volume. It's a pleasant surprise, because Iraq has always been noisy both day and night. I don't like it -- it's like the quiet right before a tornado. The living conditions here have improved dramatically in the last year. We're billeted in small trailers with air conditioning, showers, toilets that actually flush, a refrigerator stocked with cold water, juice and soda, and, best of all, real beds with real mattresses and clean sheets! We have nearly unlimited Internet access 24 hours a day.

For the most part, the dining facilities serve a huge variety of quality food. I've enjoyed excellent Mexican, Italian, Chinese and Indian food all through Iraq. Every base has fresh fruit and vegetables and way too much ice cream. You know we're fighting in comfort when you hear an officer whine, "We're out of Belgian chocolate again."

We're thankful for the good food and living quarters because our schedule is grueling: 28 comedy shows (I think) in 12 days. This is accomplished by riding in Black Hawk helicopters to as many as four FOBs, or Forward Operating Bases, a day. We cowboy up with 30-pound flak jackets and Kevlar helmets in the morning and zoom off to an FOB, do a show, hop back on the chopper and repeat. We usually end our day around 10 p.m., so we don't really get a chance to enjoy the comforts. But we're certainly glad they're available.

The troops definitely appreciate the shows, especially the small, isolated FOBs that rarely get entertainment. Comics On Duty is extremely flexible and mobile. We add shows to the schedule as needed. It's all for the troops, so we're happy to help out. [...]


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