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Iraq war widows say money would help

Feb- 2-2005 » Filed Under: General Military

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News Tribune staff and news services

Debbie Bridges and Norma Melo know about the pain and uncertainty that comes when a loved one is killed in combat. Both women lost husbands in Iraq during the past 13 months.

There’s not much the government can do to ease the pain, Bridges and Melo said Tuesday.

It can do something to help dispel the uncertainty, though, by increasing the payment made to families of U.S. troops killed in war zones.

“There’s no amount of money that’s ever going to replace the loss of that individual,” said Melo, a Spanaway resident whose husband, Staff Sgt. Julian Melo, was killed in Mosul during a December suicide bombing. “Certainly, the money would help, especially those families that have young children. We didn’t have any young, young children. We were finished raising them. At least I have that.”

A proposal by President Bush would increase the tax-free “death gratuity” paid to the families of service members killed in Afghanistan and Iraq from $12,400 to $100,000. Also, the $250,000 coverage offered to all service members at a subsidized rate under the Servicemen’s Group Life Insurance program would be raised to $400,000, and for troops in a combat zone, the government would pay the premiums on the extra $150,000 coverage.

Veterans groups and many in Congress have been pushing for such increases. [...]

Bridges is a Federal Way resident whose husband, Staff Sgt. Steven Bridges, died in a Stryker accident in December 2003. She has gotten to know many war widows since she lost her husband, meeting them in counseling and as a member of the Gold Star Wives Club, an organization of women who’ve lost their husbands in war.

She said she was fortunate that Steven was signed up for the maximum $250,000 coverage in the military’s life insurance program. But there are others who would rather pocket the modest premium every pay day, so they’re not covered.

“It’s amazing how many soldiers do not opt for the full coverage,” Bridges said. “But no soldier plans on going over there and getting killed, either. They think they’ll be fine. There are so many widows out there who get nothing.”

Money issues are the last thing the survivors think about in the first days and weeks after they lose their soldier, she said. But inevitably, they have to be dealt with.

Housing costs are a particular worry, said Melo, an Army veteran who works as a school liaison officer at Fort Lewis. Families who live on military installations must move off base after their loved one dies, she said. Relocating is a hassle and expense they often are ill-prepared to deal with, she said.

“It’s just another pressure and another decision that they have to make,” said Melo, who said she is fortunate that she and her husband bought a house about a year before his death. “I think that anything that they could do would be an added benefit. It would allow them to buy and pay for a place and at least not have to worry about that.” [...]

Bridges said she’s written U.S. Sens. Maria Cantwell and Patty Murray, as well as her congressman, U.S. Rep. Adam Smith (D-Tacoma), urging them to support the increase in benefits. Bridges, 40, had to move off Fort Lewis after her husband died. She bought a house in Federal Way, not far from her parents. She lives there with her and Steven’s 6-year-old daughter and another daughter, 17, from a previous marriage. She has another grown daughter and son.

“I really hope this passes,” Bridges said of the legislation. “No amount of money is going to bring a soldier home, but it will keep us from having to worry the rest of our lives. And for the widows whose spouses didn’t opt to receive (life insurance), the $100,000 will help a lot.”


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